Does Mother’s Day find you in an uncomfortable place? It is not by chance you found these words today. You need a few moments to be encouraged, beautiful friend. Push that darling little brew button on your coffee maker and pull up a seat at the table and let’s talk through this thing.
Because you are worth it. And because God knew you needed to read these words today.
I am so excited to share a letter from a dear friend. Loretta has shared before and this has come at the perfect time. Mother’s Day. Here is Loretta’s heart titled “The Barren Woman.”
To the Barren Woman,
I’m writing you this Mother’s Day to encourage you to keep moving forward and never give up on your dreams. I am not just another woman that doesn’t understand your pain. I’m a woman who has walked in your shoes. I’m a woman that has been through the fight of being barren and still battle it today.
It is a struggle that can’t even be described in words. I’m one of the women that has faced the pain and suffered the loss of not being able to feel life growing inside of me. I’m one that has soaked my pillow many nights crying out to God asking Him “Why me, what did I do to deserve this pain?“.
Quoting scripture after scripture to God as if God didn’t know what He promised in His Word. I was in every prayer line hoping and praying that someone would speak a word over my situation to encourage me that God heard me. Wanting nothing more to be pregnant, but always ending up empty handed.
Yes, I have felt the pain and brokenness. I have had well meaning people say to me “how blessed” I was to not have to endure the pain of childbirth. Can I just say please don’t say that to a barren woman, because no matter how much you are trying to ease their pain it’s a kick in the face.
I know the pain of walking around trying to be happy and rejoice for the rest of the pregnant women you meet. Please don’t think we are not glad for you, because we are it is just the human selfishness that surfaces no matter how hard we try to hide the truth that we face each day. You see this barrenness is a painful battle for us every day of our lives.
I have been married to a wonderful man for 25 years and I am in my 40’s and I must tell you during the intimate moments it’s still emotionally painful at times. The feeling of failing my husband as a woman. The feelings within myself as not being a woman because something is wrong with me.
It still is a slap in the face for me. I still have a longing for the experience of having a baby. I still cry and struggle with angry and rejection when I hear of or see someone pregnant. I encourage you that you are not alone.
Don’t ever let someone tell you that you are having a pity party and that you should not feel this way… God made us woman to be fruitful and desire children. Your pain is real and Mother’s Day is a struggle and a grim reminder that you were chosen to be barren.
But one thing that I have learned is that God knows what He is doing in my life and while I may feel loss and pain He is still God. I trust His direction for my life.
In my case I changed my prayer for children… In September 2012, me and my husband adopted 3 children that God prepared for us. Katelyn, Victoria and Christian are blessings from God into our lives. I tell my children that while I was praying for children God was working on my behalf.
Is the pain and desire still there to want to be pregnant? Yes, it is! But in all God’s goodness He gave me a blessing far greater than I could have ever imagined.
So to the Barren Woman who is still Motherless on this Mother’s Day be encouraged that each day is a day closer to your destiny and purpose. God is not punishing you, but He is preparing you for greatness…
Love in Christ my friend.
From Another Barren Woman
Sometimes we find ourselves being thrusted into uncomfortable, unfamiliar places. Life gets unbearable, painful and just plain sucky at times.
It’s easy in our human nature to tense up, clam up and close up.
But instead – God wants us to grow. He wants us to prosper and gain wisdom and knowledge. And sometimes we have to walk through the fire of uncertainty and unfamiliarity in order to truly understand He will never leave us of forsake us.
It’s in the fire that we are tested and refined.
This morning I was reading in 2 Corinthians and came upon this passage of scripture. I’m so blown away by Paul’s humility. He is one of my favorite authors in scripture. His is so openly transparent in his suffering.
“..for we were so utterly burdened beyond our strength that we despaired of life itself. Indeed, we felt that we had received the sentence of death. But it was to make us rely not on ourselves but on God who raises the dead.” 2 Corinthians 1:8-9
Sometimes life just plain sucks. The doctors give a grim report, job loss paralyzes our finances, friends betray us and families get ripped apart at the seams. One thing after another after another. Things spiral out of our control leaving us feeling rattled and shattered.
We are not left alone to pick up the broken pieces.
Paul even admits that life became unbearable. Pain hurts! But he goes on to say in verse 10 that they have set their hope in Christ that he will deliver them again. God remains faithful to His track record of deliverance.
Sometimes we have to endure the trials to become more pliable in His hands.
I’ve heard so many times the reference of God being the patient potter. We are the lumpy pile of clay in his hands and He patiently molds us and shapes us into who we are called to be. When we become jagged and brittle, we go back on the Potter’s wheel and are reshaped and refined. We are most pliable in the hands of the Potter.
I recorded this last night after dropping off our kids at VBS and feel so strongly that someone needs to hear these words. Please feel free to share with someone needing encouragement.
Don’t give up, my sweet friend. And don’t try to jump off the Potter’s wheel. You are safe in the palm of His hands.
Live Life Unscripted,
Some days will either make or break you.
Some are filled with such uncontainable joy and laughter. The birth of a newborn, answered prayer for salvation of a loved one, and the love shared between a husband and wife on their wedding day. Beautiful, incredible, breathtaking moments.
Then there are those when it’s all you can do to crawl out from underneath the covers. When getting up is painful because of what the day holds. Routines become mundane and difficult leaving you breathless.
James 4:14 compares our life to a morning fog that is here for a brief time then fades away. A vapor. Here for a moment and then it’s gone.
This week, we will be talking with three godly women who have walked through extremely difficult situations.
Life is short and we are not guaranteed tomorrow, so we can either abandon the outside world and remain in the fetal position in fear of what’s in front of us or make the best of the life we’ve been given.
Perspective changes everything.
We can’t control the paths this life leads us down, but there is one thing we can control – how we let them affect us.
No matter what comes our way – sickness, financial turmoil, death of a loved one, abuse – we cannot allow things to distort the way we view God.
No matter what you’re facing today, God is still faithful. He still loves you. He still has a plan for your life. He still cares for you. He holds your life in the palm of His hand and He knows every tear, fear and frustration. Just because you’re face to face with a ten foot giant does not mean God is any less God and any less present in your situation.
Please check back often this week! You don’t want to miss these ladies testimonies!
Please feel free to share your story with us! Share with someone who needs a little encouragement this week!
Love you guys!
Live Life Unscripted,