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To The Barren Woman { Special Guest Post by Loretta Yopp! }

Does Mother’s Day find you in an uncomfortable place?  It is not by chance you found these words today.  You need a few moments to be encouraged, beautiful friend.   Push that darling little brew button on your coffee maker and pull up a seat at the table and let’s talk through this thing.   

Because you are worth it.  And because God knew you needed to read these words today.   

I am so excited to share a letter from a dear friend.  Loretta has shared before and this has come at the perfect time.  Mother’s Day.  Here is Loretta’s heart titled “The Barren Woman.” 

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To the Barren Woman,

I’m writing you this Mother’s Day to encourage you to keep moving forward and never give up on your dreams. I am not just another woman that doesn’t understand your pain. I’m a woman who has walked in your shoes. I’m a woman that has been through the fight of being barren and still battle it today. 

It is a struggle that can’t even be described in words. I’m one of the women that has faced the pain and suffered the loss of not being able to feel life growing inside of me. I’m one that has soaked my pillow many nights crying out to God asking Him “Why me, what did I do to deserve this pain?“. 

Quoting scripture after scripture to God as if God didn’t know what He promised in His Word. I was in every prayer line hoping and praying that someone would speak a word over my situation to encourage me that God heard me. Wanting nothing more to be pregnant, but always ending up empty handed. 

Yes, I have felt the pain and brokenness. I have had well meaning people say to me “how blessed” I was to not have to endure the pain of childbirth. Can I just say please don’t say that to a barren woman, because no matter how much you are trying to ease their pain it’s a kick in the face. 

I know the pain of walking around trying to be happy and rejoice for the rest of the pregnant women you meet. Please don’t think we are not glad for you, because we are it is just the human selfishness that surfaces no matter how hard we try to hide the truth that we face each day. You see this barrenness is a painful battle for us every day of our lives. 
  

I have been married to a wonderful man for 25 years and I am in my 40’s and I must tell you during the intimate moments it’s still emotionally painful at times. The feeling of failing my husband as a woman. The feelings within myself as not being a woman because something is wrong with me. 

It still is a slap in the face for me. I still have a longing for the experience of having a baby. I still cry and struggle with angry and rejection when I hear of or see someone pregnant. I encourage you that you are not alone. 

Don’t ever let someone tell you that you are having a pity party and that you should not feel this way… God made us woman to be fruitful and desire children. Your pain is real and Mother’s Day is a struggle and a grim reminder that you were chosen to be barren. 

But one thing that I have learned is that God knows what He is doing in my life and while I may feel loss and pain He is still God. I trust His direction for my life. 

In my case I changed my prayer for children… In September 2012, me and my husband adopted 3 children that God prepared for us. Katelyn, Victoria and Christian are blessings from God into our lives. I tell my children that while I was praying for children God was working on my behalf. 

  

Is the pain and desire still there to want to be pregnant? Yes, it is! But in all God’s goodness He gave me a blessing far greater than I could have ever imagined. 

So to the Barren Woman who is still Motherless on this Mother’s Day be encouraged that each day is a day closer to your destiny and purpose. God is not punishing you, but He is preparing you for greatness… 

Love in Christ my friend.

From Another Barren Woman

Undeserved Love

Today was filled with little people whininess and attitudes and fussing galore. Lions and tigers and bears, OH MY! Just an all around crapola day to be frankly honest.  

So to salvage some sanity I put the kids to bed early and have been enjoying some quiet mommy and Jesus time. #breathe #sweetJesus 

I was reading and Psalm 103:10 jumps off the pages: 

 “He does not treat us as our sins deserve..” 

I was like WOOO! God you’re awesome! You’re so amazing. Wow, thank You for being so…. 
  

Then I flip open my prayer journal and find this precious, darling little note from our 6-year-old.
 Oh my heart…. ❤️

It is so amazing how God uses our kids to convict us and show us unconditional love. I don’t know when she wrote this but I definitely needed to see it tonight.  

How many times do we hold against our kids their actions?  (Or our spouse?  Our boss?  Our coworkers? Our family?

We treat them according to their behavior. Yet this is the polar opposite of how God treats us.  

The very next verse reminds us of the Father’s love. “For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him.”  Psalm 103:11 

And in verse 13, we are reminded of God’s compassion.   “As a father has compassion in his children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him.”  

Many times we find ourselves being too harsh and expecting too much. For Pete’s sake, they’re kids. We’re meant to train and equip them with life skills and show them by example how to follow Jesus. (An example I feel like I suck at sometimes. Our flesh is so weak.). 

  

Training isn’t an overnight process. It’s a marathon, not a sprint. It takes time. Patience. And more time and even more patience.  

It’s so easy to feel inadequate as a mom but God gently reminds us to keep trying. To keep going. To keep forgiving and love unconditionally. ❤️ 

Don’t fret, mama. Pray through this season and love big. You’re human. We all have meltdowns. Lay still at the feet of Jesus, forgive yourself and embrace those babies.  

Don’t let one moment of temporary insanity convince you that you suck at life.   

And in case you haven’t heard it lately – you’re AMAZING. And you’re doing a freaking awesome job.    

Share with a mama who needs some encouraging tonight.  ❤️

Live Life Unscripted, 

❤ Brittany 

Confessions of a Worn Out Mama

Girl, motherhood will either make you or break you. And lately, I have felt so broken.

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I went to bed last night with a throbbing headache and woke up at 4:30am to a little princess who just couldn’t go back to sleep after daddy left for work.

My head is still pounding. Granted, it could be a sinus infection currently carving my nasal cavity a new one. But to top it off, I think my kids have taken behavior lessons from a ravaging pack of wolves on steroids.

Can I be honest with you this morning? This worn out mama has some confessing to do. Let’s be real.

I confess….

My house currently looks like someone broke in, raided every room looking for spare change and threw all the laundry everywhere.

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I am terrible at remembering to brush my kids’ teeth. (And my own, if we’re being totally honest here.)

I have been known to leave the house and run errands without my 2-year-old’s shoes. I seriously need to hire a private investigator to find the matching shoe! Church, grocery shopping, doctor’s appointments. Shoeless.

I sometimes let my temper get the best of me and yell until my kids and I both end up in screaming matches and tears with pounding headaches. (I’m very, very ashamed of this.)

I have to say “I’m sorry” to my kids. A lot.

I have been known to take away everything from favorite movies to the pool to ever doing anything fun ever again just to stop a tantrum. (It doesn’t work, by the way. It only fuels the fire.)

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{My kids this morning. Thought we needed to break up the confessions with a happy one – I LOVE these goofy babies!}

I think one thing that prevents us from being completely honest with people and sharing our struggles is the fact that we have this fear of condemnation. What are they going to think of us? What if they think I’m a horrible excuse of a human being for thinking this way?

Honey, some seasons in life are so painful. So. Incredibly. Painful. Motherhood literally feels like you have stretched your bottom lip over your head, down your back and over your high heel shoes. It’s uncomfortable, gruesome and downright sticky. But so beautiful. Ohhhhh so beautiful – when we can find the beauty in the chaos.

Part of the beauty is sharing our ups and downs, potty training victories and dreadful moments of scraping the dog poop off our shoes..

Share your stories. Share your confessions. You are not alone, Mama! You’re in good company! Let’s do this together and break down these suffocating walls that have been isolating us for so long.

I confess… I’m a worn out mama. But girl, I find my strength when I’m face down on my pillow crying out to my Father. I’m renewed when I climb into His lap and share my heart with Him. And He rejoices and sings over me such a heavenly melody. {Zephaniah 3:17}

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He loves you so much and loves those babies even more than you do. They drive us crazy sometimes but I guarantee we drive God crazy too!

We’re going to make it. I promise.

I want to leave you with this simple verse to soak in tonight. I’m praying for you!

“I am leaving you with a gift–peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don’t be troubled or afraid.” John 14:27

Will you be open with us? Share some of your Worn Out Mama confessions below and please share this with someone!

Tomorrow my good friend Dana from The Kroh’s Nest Blog will be sharing a delicious Pumpkin Creme Bread recipe with us! Later this week we will hear more from some worn out mamas! You don’t want to miss this week!

Love you guys! Share with a worn out mama and share your thoughts below. I’d love to hear from you!

Live Life Unscripted,
❤ Brittany

Green Tree Frogs

My Darlings <3

My Darlings ❤

Tonight, it happened. Enjoying spending time with our 5-year-old making a tree frog out of a toilet paper tube, and I find myself being critical of her. She’s so proud of her solid green frog she’s painted, glued together and drawn a face on and I’m judging it. How…could…I…

This little Jesus-loving-girl who has stolen my heart long before she made her grand entrance into this world made something beautiful. She was so excited to see the finished product and smiling because I let her search Pinterest to choose the perfect tree frog to construct. And in my mind I was trying to make it better, as if I wasn’t convinced when she gave it her stamp of approval.

Kendyl is such a unique child. Her love for Jesus and people truly leave me speechless. It definitely magnifies the scripture in Proverbs 22:6 that says “Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it.”

We pray for ambulances and firetrucks that are speeding past us with sirens blazing down the highway. If someone’s car is broken down on the side of the road, she pipes up from the backseat asking if we can help them. A lady at the flea market dropped her purse and contents went flying everywhere. My hands are full of our lunch trays and drinks but Kendyl ran to her rescue – without batting an eye. I cannot tell you how proud I am to have the honor of being this girl’s mom.

You see, I’m a perfectionist. I get it honest. I’m a grammar freak and almost OCD with some things, and it drives me batty. I’m constantly trying to find ways to improve things and I must be heard. Kendyl, my darling mini-me, has inherited the same genes. Help..us..Lord..

But one thing God spoke so heavy to my heart through such a simple homework assignment – you can’t live your issues through your children. How many times are we guilty of pushing our kids to the limit? Then what? They’re broken and feel like they don’t measure up to our high standards. And if they can’t measure up to Mom and Dad’s standards, will they ever feel they can measure up to God’s?

One thing life experiences have taught me, God is an individual God. He cares so deeply about every intricate detail of our life. He knows our likes and dislikes, successes and failures. And He uses our children to convict our hearts when we need a little work around the edges.

Can I be transparent with you today? I’m not perfect. I was really hard on myself today for the thought of trying to push my way on Kendyl. Trust me, God caught me before I did. I asked her if she wanted to add anything else to it and she smiled happily and said, “Nope!” Before I could open my mouth to interject my thoughts, it was as if God gently placed His hand over my lips and quieted me.

I don’t want to break my children of their God-given abilities and talents. Just because your child may do things a little differently than you doesn’t mean their wrong. I’m not talking major moral issues here. I’m simply saying don’t make an ant hill into Mt. Everest.

I pray God keeps me humble in this area. He’s teaching me that I can’t make her into a better kid version of me. She’s not me. God created her in His image just as He did me, but she’s a different person. I have to let her be herself and pray God shows me how to help mold her into the little God-girl He’s created her to be.

Have I said I’m proud to be her mom? I love this girl. God knew what He was doing when He blessed us with this little spunk muffin. I know you’re proud of your little rock star too. Let’s hold these little hearts gently. They get damaged so easily.

Live Life Unscripted,

❤ Brittany

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Us on Easter Sunday ❤

 

 

 

 

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